How can you grow a friendship, or any kind of a relationship, if you don't put some effort into it?
You gotta keep in contact on some level, to nurture things, to get to know someone.
If you just don't have the time, or the interest, then be honest and fess up. And let it go....
Have the balls to be a man and say this isn't right or isn't the right time or whatever....
Don't string me along.
Cuz I just cut the string and walked away.
Old Knobs and Groynes
1 week ago
Sad to hear, Ponygirl. I take it this is an update to your previous post "Patiently Waiting" posted on 8 November. Men !!!
ReplyDeleteWTF? Who are you and who are you talking about???? Shan, whoever you are.... you left this comment on that previous post:
ReplyDelete"I was (or thought I was) in a similar situation a few months ago ... waiting to hear back from a man who wasn't sure what he wanted right now ... who put the brakes on our friendship.
But I have been guilty of not "letting go" as I didn't give him the time and space he needed ... and by continuing to contact him and by continuing to be slightly too interested in his life and his blog apparently this makes me a stalker ....
I'm sure you can now add 2 and 2 together, Ponygirl, and work out who I am referring to.
Yes, I know I am at fault ... I should have backed off and given him MONTHS of time, not just weeks, but perhaps it was never, ever meant to be anyway.
He did tell me (several times) that due to his complicated situation he was not sure if he was ready for or really looking for a new relationship, or just stringing me along for friendship (until he had made up his mind or something better came along).
Unfortunately I wasn't listening to the clues that I should have picked up on much earlier in the friendship and done the backing off / cutting the strings myself.
Men who have lots of existing commitments and baggage (children and previous relationships) are obviously likely to be very nervous of dipping their toes into the dangerous waters marked "relationship" for fear of getting their tootsies burned again.
Well, a lot of harsh lessons have been learned my end.
Don't mention this comment to him, Ponygirl, if poss -- he might just blog about his "stalker" again and I so don't want that -- I just wanted to empathise with you.
Best wishes,
Shan"
I wasn't 'stalking' this guy and gave him plenty of space and understanding... wait a minute! Why am I explaining this to you when I don't know who you are and what you are talking about????
Well delete my comment then. I thought yr new post was relating to your previous 8 Nov blog.
ReplyDeleteSorry if i have misinterpreted. Just delete both of my comments.
Sorry.
Hi………
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely fantastic post! Good job!
Great! Keep writing…….
Good week……… Welcome to my blog…….
Shan: Thsi post is relating to the Nov. 8th post. I just have no idea who you are and who you are talking about. So you didn't misinterpret.... but if you actually want me to understand this, you better supply more details.
ReplyDeleteFemin Susan: Thanks about the post. I just wish I hadn't had to do this.
I am in the process of "letting go" of someone as well. We've been seeing each other for over a year and while I still really care for him, I am ending it.
ReplyDeleteHe says he loves me and wants to be with me, but is not making any real effort to actually do so. In my opinion, life is too short to be in a nowhere relationship.
As you know, letting go is not an easy thing to do, but sometimes it's the right thing to do.
You are so full of love and light, I am sure the right man will come into your life soon.
Hugs,
Laurie